Managing your child’s bad behaviour is wearing.
If the negativity starts to flow constantly – every day – it will soon have you walking on egg-shells around them.
Askign them to change is unlikely to get you anywhere.
They may really want to but our psychology just isn’t made up that way.
Changing because they feel guilty or because they are going to get sanctioned are negative emotions that are the least effective way of leading to behaviour change.
Behaviour change takes a constant effort. It takes a grit and determination and if your child has already got into the habit of negativity then – bad behaviour will be their ‘go-to’ behaviour – their default.
It Starts With You
The easiest way to get your child to change – in fact anybody to change – is to change your own behaviour.
Change how you respond so that you don’t get caught up in the cycle of negativity.
Change it so that you can show your child that there is another way.
Again, it will take effort on your part – but really take your time to assess and understand how you respond to your child’s behaviours.
Is there something that you could change so that you don’t add fuel to the fire?
This is not a case of holding you responsible – instead of placing the accountability squarely at your child’s feet. This is about improving your relationship for the better – so that you can get to a point of resolution.
If you see patterns in your child’s bad behaviour – that pattern can be broken.
If your child’s behaviour involves you – then you can be one of the masterminds to break it!
Next time your teen’s bad behaviour in the home gives you cause for concern – take a minute just to really see.
If you need help with this – you, of course, know where to find me.